Jenna Bush Hager Reflects on Mom-Shaming As Her 4-Year-Old Son Moves to His ‘Big Boy Bed’

It's been a big few weeks for Today co-host Jenna Bush Hager and her family. For the first time since he was born, her 4-and-a-half-year-old son Hal slept in a "big boy bed." Bush Hager shared the update on the January 18 edition of her show alongside co-host Hoda Kotb.

Bush Hager got a lot of attention in October of 2023 when she admitted on the air that her son was still sleeping in his crib. At the time, the talk show host said Hal told her he didn't want to move until "next Christmas" and had hoped to be the only kindergartener in a crib.

Reflecting on that time, Bush Hager says "Y'all had shamed me and really the whole community had shamed me for the fact that he was in a crib. And I said 'OK Hal I think it's time. Some friends have said it's time to move.' And he was not ready. He was scared."

But something changed about a week ago.

"I was ill—I was quarantined. I was pushed away... you know, I had the COVID," Bush Hager explained. "I was pushed away into my room watching all that was on television."

"And Hal was free to be me, himself," Kotb chimed in.

"So Henry heard him say, 'Daddy! Daddy! And then he went in and he said, 'I'm ready.' 'And Henry said, ‘You’re ready for what?’ He said, ‘I need to move into my big boy bed,'" Bush Hager continued.

That "big boy bed" was ready for Hal. In fact, Bush Hager said it had been in his room for about two years. Then she said something that probably many of us as parents think about.

"But it all happened without his mother's help. And that leads me to wonder if I'm too overbearing?" Bush Hager said.

In the end, moving from the crib to his bed was Hal's decision and Hal's decision alone.

"You know what I love? He really did tell you when he was ready," Kotb added. "And what difference does it make if he's in a crib or in a bed and when he's 20 he's not going to remember he wasn't in a bed until he was 4 1/2."

So despite the parent-shaming Bush Hager went through initially, everything worked out fine in the end. To be honest, letting Hal figure it out on his own was probably a better learning experience for him.

When Bush Hager first brought up this issue in October, Parents asked our experts when children should move from a crib to a bed.

“Kids develop at different rates, and are ready to move out of a crib and into a bed at different ages,” explains Eran Magen, PhD, a psychologist who is also the CEO of Early Alert, and founder of Parenting For Humans. Dr. Magen noted the typical age to make that transition is between 1 and a half and 3 and a half.

Experts told Parents that safety is the top priority. If toddlers are not climbing out of their cribs, they're probably safer there. Having the child's support in making the move to the bed will also make for an easier transition for both them and you.

As Bush Hager acknowledged, Hal is her youngest child and perhaps some of it was her not wanting her baby to grow up.

“Transitions can be hard for kids and for parents, who want to cling to those wonderful moments when our kids are little. They don't stay little for long so it's bittersweet,” says Ari Brown, MD, an Austin, Texas-based pediatrician and founder of the Baby 411 book series and parent education. “Acknowledging that your child is growing up, but will always be your baby, and finding ways to continue preserving those emotional bonds as they grow, is the key.”